What a Week It Has Been

What a week it has been. This is a bit dramatic but I am a different person today than I was on Sunday.

Sunday

I woke up at my parent’s house, spent a little while watching the dogs play, and tried to avoid getting in the way.

I left their house a little before they did. I went to LC, they went to church. I did go to church but later that morning for late service.

After church, a friend and I went to Red Wing and ran some errands. It was so fun. I love shopping with other people even if it is to find bolts at Menards and groceries at Walmart.

After our errands, we stopped at Culver’s and picked up food for lunch. We took our lunches down by the river. It was so pretty! We ate, talked, laughed, and thanked the Lord He brought us to the same church.

After our lunch, we headed back home but stopped in Frontenac at a cute little shop. I got out of the car, walked towards the building, walked up the steps walked into the shop and I couldn’t stand up. My back went out when I walked into the shop. OK. Not a huge deal, I worked it out, stretched, and though I was in pain I was able to stand up straight after a while I was able to breathe and laugh I was ok. Well, we went back into the car and arrived at my house. She helped me carry in my groceries (thank you thank you thank you!!!!!) After I finished putting them away I laid down on my bed for a while trying to stretch. It was so weird, I couldn’t twist I could barely get up after that to get ice (I had talked to my mom about what to do. She said to ice it.)

OK. I made it through the afternoon, I made dinner, I talked to a friend, I moved to the recliner. I was doing ok.

Monday

Sunday night went ok. I spent the whole night sleeping flat on my back. Wasn’t great. I woke up super early and spent most of my extra time icing and stretching.

I went to work for an hour or so, called the chiropractor, and headed to Wabasha for my appointment. Got it laughed at the silly moment and situation then went out to my car on my way. I spent the majority of my day switching between heat and ice. Walking to the bathroom and the kitchen trying not to twist or lift too much.

That was hard. I talked to some friends I watched some of my favorite childhood movies (Princess Diaries I and II) and tried to work on loosening my back. I was feeling pretty good that afternoon and night.

Tuesday

All I wanted to do was wear pants.

I woke up feeling really good. I was chipper, I was able to move and I didn’t have any pain. I was so relieved I was in the clear. I took a shower. All was well! I dried off. All was well! Yup, you got it, I tried to put on pants and on the floor, I was hugging the toilet. I was able to work my way over to a space I could lay down to stretch out the reaction. Well, I was on the floor for about an hour trying to stretch, relax, and eventually get back up.

Well, I did get back up but then I couldn’t stand up straight. That took another 20 minutes or so. I called in to work long ago saying I was out for the day.

My mom came (thank you thank you thank you!!!!) and helped me with some chores and a big smile to help guide me. She had spent much of the hour with me talking things through what to do next learning how my body reacts to certain positions.

By the time she got here, I was up and standing straight and went through a cycle or two of ice and heat. I spent much of my morning in my recliner (I would be lost without that purchase…) until my chiropractor appointment. I don’t get embarrassed easily which is very good…because I threw my back out for the second time in a week trying to put on pants. The first one was walking into a store. Y’all! This is ridiculous!

OK. We finish at the chiropractor and run over to the grocery store to pick up a few things. Of course, it ends up being a little more than we planned. This is the point I realized I don’t like not being able to do things for myself. And since that moment it has become more and more relevant.

My amazing mom is walking around the store with her arms full of groceries and we decide to have pizza for lunch…from the frozen section. I reach up to grab it. First of all, it is in the way back of the shelf, second OUCH! I was so frustrated. As I was reaching to try grabbing my mom was saying “Kristina, Kristina, Kristina” behind me. I wanted to help. I wanted to do something. I felt ridiculous! I couldn’t grab a pizza from the back of the shelf.

I am 22 years old. I threw my back out walking into a shop and pulling on pants. I have been no help around my own house, I have called into work causing my boss and colleague to cover for me because I can’t get up. I don’t get it. I don’t like it. I want to change it. I have been nursing my back for days and I don’t see much improvement.

Wednesday

I threw my back out slightly walking up the stairs. ARE YOU KIDDING ME????? I didn’t take a shower, instead, I rotate between heat and ice for an hour calling into work to cover for me. I did make it to work today which made me feel better. Boy did it hurt. I didn’t realize 1) how much I twist and turn in a day 2) how often I am up and down 3) how exhausting it could be when you aren’t 100%.

I spent the last hour of my morning daydreaming of the recliner and my ice pack. It wasn’t bad, my back had loosened up throughout the morning but I am so nervous it will lock up and spazz or freak out again.

Starting from the beginning of my workday to the end. It was bookended and I didn’t like it. I have restrictions on lifting and twisting and movement such as that. Makes sense. Well, this morning someone had put a can of ice salt to hold the door open. That’s great and all but I didn’t know how to safely move it. A teacher (who has had movement problems in the past) picked it up with ease. OK. Also, she went up two flights of stairs multiple times to put the chapel service on the computer. I didn’t want to do all those stairs because that is what caused me to be late to work in the first place. What a gem. Then at the end of the day, the doorbell rings. I leave the office to answer and the delivery man leaves a package. I go outside to grab it. I open the door and look at the package and say, out loud, I didn’t think this through. I went back inside asking the principal if he would be so great and pick it up for me. He makes a comment ‘it’s like my wife all over again.” My response, “believe me, not my choice.”

I do not like being restricted so much. I don’t like asking people to do the simplest of things for me like grab a pizza, move a bucket, or pick up a box. I am 22 years old for Pete’s sake and I am asking people older than me to help me out and do things for me. This is ridiculous! I know, it will get better. I am also struggling with the fact that I have never been out this long. a day and a half is the longest I have gone. It has always been my neck affected this bad, it has never been my back. This is all new territory and I don’t understand it.

For the first time in months, I was feeling great! I had bad allergies but I didn’t let that stop me. Other than that, I felt great, my head was clear, I was actually happy again, I was able to spend time with my family and have guests. I am actually happy. Then I get this. Why? To teach me it is ok to ask for help? To teach me to slow down? To teach me I can do a lot and do not take it for granted? I don’t know, what I do know is I am ready for this back to be figured out and Thursday to come. I have a bigger ice pack coming and I am very excited! Oh boy.

Thursday

Oh boy was the morning rough. I got out of bed I was ok. I tried to get dressed…ouch! I must have twisted weird. The only way I could walk or stand and breathe at the same time was by putting pressure on my back in one spot. My arm hurt after doing that for a period of time.

There was also the fact that I could not find a comfortable position. What worked a few minutes before didn’t work a while later.

I did end up going to work. I pushed through and forced myself to go. I really don’t like calling in sick when I am not sick, when I can move it just hurts. So, we took it easy and tried to not make it worse. There was a moment I turned around and must have twisted my back because I had to stop and reposition and gasp for air a second.

Around 11:30 or so it was a lot better. Still very sore but I didn’t have to push on my back anymore. I could walk and breathe at the same time!

My mom and aunt came (thank you thank you thank you!!!!!!!!) to clean and ready the house for the weekend. They did so much that morning I really appreciate them!

That afternoon I would still hear my mom saying my name every once in a while when I reached or stretched for something but not as often as earlier in the week. I am slowly getting more ok with asking and accepting help. I think the pain pushed me to accept it but we are getting there in any case!

I did more heat and ice rotations all evening to try keeping it calm and loose.

Friday

Oh my goodness. I woke up really stiff but little pain! I decided my first goal for the day was to not twist. My second was to keep breathing. Both were accomplished fairly well. I did end up catching myself twisting but I moved slowly enough I could catch it before going too far.

I was stiff and tight all day but so nervous to stretch too much. I have a full weekend in many ways and couldn’t afford to be flat on the floor again.

This last part of the week I have been waking up around 5 am taking my morning medication getting dressed or taking a shower and dressing then taking ibuprofen and starting ice and heat rotations till 7:30ish when I head to work. These seemed to have helped a lot not only to start my day right but also to keep me well throughout the day.

Normally I would come home around 12ish and do ice and heat rotations for the afternoon or sometimes evening too. Yesterday I did it in the evening but not in the afternoon. Today I did not do it at all. I rested after work but I didn’t do any rotations.

This weekend I have guests so I can’t really use my recliner as I have been. Maybe early mornings I will but the rest of the day I either have to be ok or find a new spot.

This afternoon I was feeling ok enough to sit on my bed. I haven’t been able to do this for any period of time all week. I was able to sit at my table and do paperwork. Again, haven’t really been able to do that comfortably all week. It has been quite a week but today was a really good day. I was actually chipper and happy and feeling good.

I don’t think I overdid it. I am so nervous to overdo it. I don’t want to wake up tomorrow or Sunday and not be able to serve breakfast or do any of my responsibilities this weekend. I have been living in dresses and I think I will continue that through the weekend. I don’t want to have the same issue as I did Tuesday morning. I am not quite ready to pull on pants again.

I am thanking the Lord for all of the wonderfully supportive people in my life today. Everyone has been understanding, helpful, and willing to jump in whenever it is needed.

Thank you Father for giving me a day of peace. I ask you to help me this weekend. I ask you to give me reminders to take it to slow easy and keep working the legs and hips rather than the back 🙂

Tonight I ask you to help me fall asleep easily so I am able to do my work tomorrow. I thank you for all my family, friends, and acquaintances who have been so helpful this week. I thank you especially for my mama who answered her phone early in the morning while I was having much trouble and a bit of panic. Thank you Father for this wonderful life and showing me how incredible the bodies you created are. Everything is connected and one thing taken away can cause everything to shut down.

You are one amazing creator. In Your name, I pray. Amen.